Dyin' Howard Strikes Again

The 2014 season is just 8 games old for the Phillies, but they reside in last place in the National League East. They've lost three straight games entering Thursday, when they attempt to avoid a sweep at Citizens Bank Park to the Milwaukee Brewers.

The Phillies have made 6 errors in the last three games. Their opponents have scored 15 runs in the innings the Phillies have made errors in those games. 

Even though his team has looked less than good lately - and their only series win came against the woeful Chicago Cubs - first baseman Ryan Howard said the Phillies have played "very well."

"In all actuality we’ve actually played very well this year," Howard said Thursday afternoon. "I disagree with everybody else. Our record doesn’t necessarily reflect that right now, but, you know, we’ve played well. We had three real bad games. So the only thing to do is go out there and try to win again." - Philly.com

I would say, "You're kidding right?" but it's Dyin' Howard we're talking about here.  Only this $25 million a year suckbag could be this out of touch with reality.  Don't blame Howard though,  he's merely a reflection of what this team has become.  From early on when Ruin Tomorrow Jr. tried to sell us on the fact that Marlon Byrd would put us over the edge, to Jonathon Papelbon telling us that the bullpen would be a top five bullpen in baseball this year, there is clearly a plan.  Find as many out of touch assholes, throw them on a team and watch that team crumble.  I hate everyone on this team, I really do.  I tried to tell myself that I didn't mind Cliff Lee, but one good apple doesn't save a rotten bushel.

Inevitably there will be chirpers that will say that this is a classic Philly fan move, that I loved them when they were good and now I hate them because they're bad.  Well you're wrong dickweeds.  I didn't like them then, I put up with them because they were winning a lot of baseball games, and I HATE them now.  This isn't even like the Sixers.  As I've said before this year's Sixers team is one of my favorites in recent memory.  Certainly my favorite since AI tha God left.  Just can't stand overpaid douchers who think that they can do whatever they want because they won some games a couple years ago.

By the way the Phillies have the third highest payroll in baseball at $170 million.  I'd like to take a minute to show the current rosters salaries vs. what their actual values are.

Catcher - Carlos Ruiz - Expected Value Salary - $3,000,000 - Actual Salary $8,500,000
First Base - Ryan Howard - $7,000,000 - $25,000,000
Second Base - Chase Utley - $8,700,000 - $15,000,000
Shortstop - Jimmy Rollins - $6,000,000 - $11,000,000
Third Base - Cody Asche - $490,000 - $490,000
Left Field - Dominic Brown - $9,500,000 - $550,000
Center Field - Ben Revere - $6,000,000 - $1,950,000
Right Field - Marlon Byrd - $8,000,000 - $8,000,000

Cliff Lee - $14,000,000 - $25,000,000
Cole Hamels - $9,000,000 - $20,000,000
A.J. Burnett - $12,000,000 - $16,5000,000

These numbers were based on WAR, PRV, and I even threw in a little cultural significance, to explain higher than average salaries.  I was most surprised at Marlon Byrd.  I thought he was grossly overpaid in the offseason, but his contract is fairly consistent with what he deserved from last season's performance.  Ben Revere was also a pleasant surprise even if I did have to extrapolate a second half of a season in order to get his PRV.  Anyway, total cost of the players listed in reality is $131,990,000.  Expected value for those same players is $80,690,000.  Nice job Ruben, nice job.