To most, this is probably a shock, but to the few ultra special people in this here world of ours (18% of the world's most special people write for this blog), we all knew this would be coming one day.
He decided to give his exciting announcement, while sporting an American Flag Blazer, on the very day that the 2013 world series champion Boston Red Sox visit the Commander in chief.
Y'all probably have some pretty urgent questions, and I'm here to help try and answer some potential commonly asked questions.
Potential Question #1: What position will he be running for?
A: President. Pretty embarrassed I had to even answer that one.
Potential Question #2: What party will he be representing?
A: He's too hung to be a Democrat. Too literate to be a
conservative. Not a pussy, so green party is out of the question. And independents might be as relevant as broccoli on a big man's diet. So I'm just gonna be the first one to say he is about to start the America Party ('bout time).
Potential Question #3: Who will be his Vice President?
A: Obviously, the people that do not actually know this man are the one's asking this ridiculous question. He will be his own vice.
A: Irrelevant.
Gomes '16!
Andrew Jackson-esque
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