My First Playboy

Now I know what you're thinking.  "Commish you're such a fully grown red blooded, all american, beer drinking, money making, football watching, baseball loving, milk enthusiast man! There is no way this could be your first run in with a playboy."  Well the jig is up guys, I'm just not the man you thought I was.  One time in like 7th grade I found one of my friend's parent's Penthouse.  That's about the extent of my exposure to adult magazines.

Now that I've lifted that huge burden from my chest we can move on.  What I discovered while perusing the pages of the April 2014 Playboy is that we aren't so much different.  In fact, if Playboy could be a person it would be me, or if I could be a magazine it would probably be Playboy.  Let me explain.

I went into my first Playboy fully expecting about 100 pages of straight tit pics.  Nothing too graphic, more like the soft porn thats on Cinemax late night.  You fiends know what I'm talking about.  Anyway, what I realized is that it is mostly intellectual articles, with some awkward humor and random titties floating around the pages.  Articles for this month included a very interesting piece on the state of Chicago entitled "To Live and Die in Chiraq" and a massive interview with comic legend Stan Lee.

So yeah, this is basically me in a nutshell.  The outward appearance is that I'm only about chasing tail and being a doucher, but in actuality I'm an intellect, with a pretty uncomfortable sense of humor that happens to like naked girls.  Boom.  Playboy = Commish.  Good talk guys.